I remember reading The Princess and the Frog when I was younger and thinking, wow, it takes a really brave woman to let a frog into her life!
But after it turned into some hot dude who apparently had been cursed and shoved into a frog’s body, I thought, okay, that was totally worth it.
But this isn’t some fairytale, this is life! And that ‘frog’ you have with you isn’t going to turn into some hot dude from a fancy castle – no matter how many times you kiss him.
He might be a wonderful individual, considerate and kind and everything we want in men who look like Channing Tatum but when you think about holding his hand and introducing him to your friends…you imagine them smiling just to be polite but what they really want to ask you is…what are you thinking?
You are not insane – if it’s any consolation – you just refuse to be taken in by the shallow things some individuals consider priorities.
And as sweet as that is, even you can’t deny that there are a few things you wish you could change about this man you call ‘boyfie’ - and maybe one day ‘hubby’.
For starters, it is one thing to be seriously unattractive, and it is another to be seriously unattractive, unsophisticated, unclassy, with no charisma or charm whatsoever and to top it all off, not in-the-know about many things that you feel he should be.
I hope I am not offending anyone here because I pride myself in telling it as it is. And like I’ve said before, if you don’t like it, my suggestion box is somewhere at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean – I suggest you go with proper underwater gear and look out for sharks!
Moving on, before you are convinced that his flaws are a deal breaker, get ready to bring out that magic wand you have hidden away. If the guy actually looks like a frog, then for that fairytale ending, you need to bring him out of hiding.
The problem is, men do not see things the way we do. To them, change is overrated and nagging them won’t work – it never does.
Gently cajole and encourage your man in a subtle way – making surehe does not feel as if you are making suggestions to improve everything from his grammar to his unkempt hair to his less-than-polished appearance.
Give him gifts without directly suggesting that he is in dire need of them. For example, if you would like him to try some new cologne then surprise him with a bottle. If his wardrobe could use a little boost then buy him something that you would love to see him in and will suit him.
Do not get carried away, make sure you stick as close to his style as possible or you will be faced with that awkward question – what’s wrong with how I look? All you need is for him to be a little more polished – not turn him into Prince Charming because that is a little unlikely.
If you are lucky, he might take it as a tremendous compliment that you find him sexy enough to buy him a gift that will make him even sexier.
Find an interesting way to bring up some of the issues you wish he was more informed about – he might take interest too. If you do not know how to be interesting yourself then you have a problem.
You might want to choose one night a week or so to try something a little more cultured together. He may feign enjoyment at first but in time, he very well may be singing a different tune! The key is to have fun and share some laughter together. Show your enthusiasm and your passion for different things and he will follow suit!
There is nothing wrong with wanting to make a few improvements, just don’t take too many liberties with the alterations. And while you are at it, be open to making improvements with yourself too, after all, no one is perfect!