BACHELOR. When it comes to this subject, many generalizations and misconceptions spring up. Misconceptions that, as a bachelor myself, I’ll not shy away from disproving. I have the experience!
Generally, people have learnt to lump all bachelors together, as simply men who are not yet married. The belief is that these yet-to-be-married young men share similar patterns of interests and character traits. Most people also assume bachelorhood to be synonymous with the perfect life.
Far from it, bachelorhood is a complicated way of life, often devoid of the fun, freedom and all the other perks associated with it.
Generally speaking, there are two core types of bachelor; let’s call them ‘primary’ and ‘secondary’ bachelor if you don’t mind. The character traits and needs of these two groups are several worlds apart!
The primary bachelor is the more humble, less sophisticated breed of bachelor. This type easily constitutes the biggest number of single men in Kigali. This is where you find the younger single men, with their ages generally ranging from 18 to the mid 20s.
Usually, they are fresh from college, and if lucky to be employed, still work at entry-level jobs, which offer a basic subsistence wage. By this very fact, it is almost the norm that this type of bachelor tends to live up with a friend so that they may pool resources in order to maintain a fairly decent life while minimizing costs.
Generally speaking, primary bachelors eat fast food seven days a week, and put up in messy houses with mold growing on the plates. There is an overall lack of structure in their lives.
The secondary bachelor, on the other hand, is the one who has advanced financially, professionally and in age from the primary stage.
He is much cleaner, responsible and mature in outlook. Typically, he is between his early to late thirties, steadily employed, and armed with a decent pay cheque.
This is where you find Kigali’s ‘most eligible bachelors’ as the society pages of our papers so like to describe them. Naturally, the primary bachelors also strongly crave to graduate to these ranks before making the ultimate leap into marriage.
But the real defining characteristic of the senior bachelor is his relative maturity and handsome pay cheque. As a direct result of this newfound economic freedom, this class of bachelor usually opts to live alone.
The senior bachelor’s pad, although neat and tasteful, is still not stylish enough to appear like a home in which a woman could soon move. Yeah, boys will be boys!
Unlike the primary bachelor, who does not give a damn what his crib looks like, the senior bachelor tries as much as possible to make his house woman-friendly. Typically, a senior bachelor’s house screams: “This is a comfortable place. Let’s go to bed!”
Generally, once the Primary Bachelors enters his mid 20s, he begins to tire of the life. He tires of eating fast/junk food 365 days a year, he tires of the mess and litter in the house, the mold growing on the plates; the dirty bed sheets…you name it.
Then again, how do you explain the fact that, despite the obviously improved living conditions we see in the senior stages of bachelorhood, most bachelors tend to stay shorter in this period than they did in the initial bachelorhood stage?
It boils down to a simple principle we were taught in economics class; that, as an individual begins to afford and accumulate nicer things in life, he tends to seek better care for HIMSELF and for these things!