Aunties Corner: Help! I’m in love with a married man!

Dear Aunt Kiki, I am a young single lady with a stable job. I met a married man a few months ago and now I am in love with him.

Dear Aunt Kiki,

I am a young single lady with a stable job. I met a married man a few months ago and now I am in love with him. This is scary because this man is a dedicated father of four and a loving husband to his wife. What is surprising is that the man has told me that he will never leave his wife for any woman, but at the same time he has prophesied his love for me. What do I do?
Annabel
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Dear Annabel,

At your age, I expect you to read things in black and white. How can you fall in love with a married man? More so who has already told you that he will never leave his wife for you? You ought to make a decision now lest you make a wrong move and regret later. You need to think again about your relationship with this man. Although some married men do leave their wives, and take up with the new woman, in many cases, the man is just playing around and will likely stay with his wife - particularly if he has children with her.

Some married men get bored with the same pattern of life, so most often than not they have one affair after the other. The unfortunate part is that, when he is done with you, he will go back home to his family. One reason that some men do this is that it is easier to have affairs, and then return to his wife, than it is to leave his wife and family and start all over again. You must understand that men who are in relationships outside marriage simply want to have other women but without the commitment.

Maybe you want to think twice about this affair my daughter. Do you know that during holidays you will never get to see him? While you will be lonely at home, he will be busy loving his wife and children. Also do not expect him to spend a night in your house, he will come to you only when he needs to, in short, expect many broken promises. The man will promise to take you on an outing, and then find out that his wife made other plans, and cancel on you, not her. He will definitely promise to make it up to you but, again, something comes up, and you are left alone and crushed. You will always be in tears.

Another important thing to note is that, if a man is cheating on his wife with you, then chances are that he is cheating on you with another woman. How is that? It hurts terribly to know that a man is cheating on you even, after accepting to have a relationship with him in full knowledge of his marital status.  Now this is where the clincher is; are you not afraid of having a relationship with a man who has multiple partners? Think of your worst nightmare and you will come to your senses.

A piece of advice here; get out of this relationship as quickly as possible. Do it for these reasons: because you do not want to destroy a family or be called a husband snatcher, or because you do not want a relationship with a liar and a cheater.

Respect yourself, dump him and move on; you will find a man who will be worth of your love and you will be happier, all in due time.

 

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