Are men stereotyped as sex obsessed?

Every now and then, I get caught up in discussions about sex; whether I’m having coffee in the morning or munching lunch with friends, the easiest topics that I find myself inclining to are three; sex, football and politics. Male folks all over the world will testify the same.
Ivan Mugisha & Rachel Garuka
Ivan Mugisha & Rachel Garuka

Stereotyped is an understatement

Every now and then, I get caught up in discussions about sex; whether I’m having coffee in the morning or munching lunch with friends, the easiest topics that I find myself inclining to are three; sex, football and politics. Male folks all over the world will testify the same.

The taste for being open minded about sex hasn’t done men any good in the eyes of women; to very many women, men are all about “that thing” like Lauryn Hill warned in her hit single that goes by the same title.

A bold female friend of mine once told me that a man will do literally anything to sleep with a woman he desires.

Not that I hadn’t heard this kind of stereotype before, but most times I’m actually hoping that whoever says such  is joking and doesn’t mean it.

To my dismay however, with a straight face she said, “I am not talking about a few, many or some men, I am talking about all men!”

Unfortunately, as I have found out, many women believe that to be the truth, and treat every man cautiously, most times with judgmental and contemptuous attitudes

The scientifically disproved myth that a man’s brain is largely thinking about sex, hasn’t done any good either. It has only encouraged more women to fall into a gender –stereotype trap that denies them the freedom to enjoy male company.

Well, with the unfounded generalizations done away with, men are not always thinking about sex and are at least not obsessed.

Therefore these myths that some women go branding every man that will share a word or as much glance at them, should stop!

 As a matter of fact, these actions are tantamount to violation of men’s rights and are typically gender insensitive. Well knowing that gender equality movements are sweeping across the nation, men have a right to be who they naturally are, without fear of being negatively depicted.

Besides that, sex is a consensual act between two people, a man and a woman (that is; natural sex, without mentioning the deviations and pervasions.) that means that if men are sex obsessed, so are the women who they have sex with- and we all know not to be true.

There is more to a man than just sex. A man thinks about the future, a man thinks about how to make money, a man thinks about how live morally and uprightly and above all, a man is obsessed with making his woman happy.

That is why loneliness will always bite at the hearts of some young women who shun every man who comes their way, just because they think that the innocent man has only sex in his head.

Let’s face it; sex is a good and enjoyable act when done in the right context, but it has also been stereotyped as a terrible and evil thing. When God created people, he blessed them and told them to “multiply and fill the earth”. How else can people multiply and fill the earth without indulging in sex?

In conclusion, whether men talk about it or brag about it, it doesn’t mean that they are obsessed with it. It also doesn’t necessarily mean that when a man looks at a woman, he desires to sleep with her.

Most times he is simply appreciating her beauty, something completely different from being obsessed with sex.

@RushAfrican on Twitter


Nope…it’s a fact!

Sometimes I think I have the most interesting friends. One guy was so offended by the insinuation that men were obsessed with sex that after arguing all he could, he irritably concluded, “What’s wrong with that anyway. It’s just sex for crying out loud, not murder!”

I dare you – anyone - to bring a man who doesn’t want to get under the skirt of a hot girl. If by some miracle he can control himself, I bet the frozen yogurt in my freezer he is wondering what it would be like.  

The worst part is, that men who do not like being stereotyped that way, end up being the most obsessed. They are just skilled at hiding it. They will argue the loudest when the topic comes up and even threaten to bet their heads. They go as far as saying not all men should be stereotyped that way yet when it comes to stereotyping women, they are all too ready.

Men have forever said women are obsessed with money. Now maybe some bad apples killed it for us all but at least it is not on our minds 99% of the time!  That same friend of mine went on to say that sex was a basic need in marriage and dating alike. Apparently if a wife or girlfriend doesn’t commit to a man physically, and I quote, “How can she not expect him to cheat on her?”

I guess the guy was just being honest - which is more than I can say for some chaps. Some guys will go to any lengths to cover their faults. Yeah – apparently men are encouraged to exhibit their worst behavior because they are treated so poorly by most of the women they encounter. Really?

I’ve seen guys chase after one woman for the longest time without signs of giving up. I used to think it was because he was really into her but after getting her, I got my answer. He simply didn’t want to miss out on even one of his conquests and if that meant acting the fool just to please her then so be it!

So maybe my next observation might be a bit unfair but what the heck. Try telling your boyfriend you want to watch a romantic movie like The Notebook. If he doesn’t insist you are lame he will tell you to go ahead and watch it yourself. Then try telling him to watch something of a more physical nature like Showgirls and watch him immediately light up.

This isn’t a stereotype, it’s a simple truth. If a man is not having sex, he’s thinking about having sex! Some guys have no limits; they will vibe relatives, friends, in – laws, and pretty much anything feminine. To them, crossing the line doesn’t scare them. Kill me now – I’ve said it!

Men get erections at the strangest hours of the day. Don’t ask me how I know, I just do. If for example a guy is in church, and he gets a glimpse of the back thighs of a woman walking past him, that is enough. It won’t matter if he is in the Lord’s presence or house for that matter. I’ve never heard of a woman getting aroused by a man’s arms while she was in church!

Even with their rightful women seated right next to them, they never miss an opportunity to glance at the hot babe on the opposite row. Even though there is a chance that he won’t do anything about it, there’s a greater chance he at least thought about it. We are not mind readers – but we know!

Men need to behave more like gentlemen and not sexist, womanizing, egocentric jerks. That is what no sex turns them into. And that is a fact!!!


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