Friends or boyfriend; what is it going to be?

Being in a spot where you have to choose between your friends and your boyfriend is no trivial matter. It is quite perturbing when your boyfriend starts assuming the role of a husband one month into the relationship!
Alinda Lillian Munanura
Alinda Lillian Munanura

Being in a spot where you have to choose between your friends and your boyfriend is no trivial matter. It is quite perturbing when your boyfriend starts assuming the role of a husband one month into the relationship!

Men give you all the space you need in the early weeks of a relationship and soon after do the exact opposite; they start questioning every move you make and start to follow up on the friends you hang out with.

In the first place, your boyfriend met you while you had your friends, so I do not understand why a problem comes about when you want to hang out with them once in a while. At this point you begin to wonder what happened to all the confidence he had when you two met. Where on earth did the self esteem go?

The same applies to men in a similar situation. I know of certain ladies who meet men and decide to make it their life’s mission to change them. But change them to what exactly? Why not search for exactly what you want, find the right man for you and leave the rest as are they are? Besides, what makes you think that you can change him for the better? You either appreciate him the way he is or move on.  Women need to stop assuming the role of creation and leave that to the expert, God!

Before I drift away into the complicated mind of a woman, let me get back to the self appointed ‘husband’. When he starts to make decisions on who you hang out with, who he thinks is a good friend and who isn’t, his opinion becomes noise that eventually turns into an annoying buzz in your ears.

Is it right to just get rid of long-term friends? People you’ve known for ages, some of whom have gone to great lengths to be there for you in situations that you thought you would never get through? And now that you’ve got a man, it is time to move on. Should it really be that way?

We have to keep in mind that what goes around comes round. We should not throw out people that have been there for us through bad times and all for there will be a time when we will need them and they’ll be gone.

While I say this, I have to note the frienemies. These ones without a doubt leave me wondering if they were purposefully sent by the Devil.  Do not confuse good friends for these wolves in sheep skin.

That said, as girls, we should know that if one of our friends gets a boyfriend, she needs to spend time with him. Showing up at her door step to hang out every time simply won’t do.  If you are always complaining about how your friends have no time for you because they have boyfriends, get yourself one!

 

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