I just hate it when people think being in a relationship is the most important thing in the world. A friend of mine finds it fit to lie about her relationship status because she can’t bare the thought of people knowing she is single – not even for a day.
Truthfully, she is rarely single because she jumps from one bad relationship to another in an attempt to not be single. I finally managed to squeeze the truth out of her, as I was concerned about all these bad relationships and why she kept falling for the same guy with a different look. She said she was scared of being alone - something about a phobia for being single!
I insisted she had friends and family who cared heaps for her and that she wasn’t alone but all she gave me was a look that suggested family was not the same as having a boyfriend. It was then that I noticed she had never really been a happy person. Her idea of happiness was having a boyfriend even though they constantly fought and she’d broken up with so many, she’d literally lost count.
Being single doesn’t mean the end of the world. It damn sure doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you either. Find happiness within yourself and you will find that ‘singlehood’ isn’t as bad as it seems. You cannot rely on anyone else to make you happy because true happiness starts from within.
To start you need to acknowledge all the good things you have, not focus on what you don’t have, which in this case would be a partner. As humans, one of our most natural mistakes is cursing everything we don’t have, forgetting to be grateful for what we do have. God’s patience must be wearing thin.
Look around you. What are the true blessings you have in life? A wonderful and supportive family? A chain of friends who have your back all the time? A great job? Spending night after night irritable about something as irrelevant as a boyfriend will just cost you everything else you take for granted. Count your blessings for food, for shelter, for comfort, for joy.
You can get love from many places, not just in a significant other. You give and receive love from your family; you give and receive love from your friends, your neighbours and even your pets. Find ways to feel secure and also add a little variety to your life. Go bungee jumping, take a trip upcountry or if you have the money, to another country, start cycling, climb the Eiffel Tower in Paris for all I care – just find things to do.
When you are able to accomplish all these things, you can easily attract the person you want, not need, in your life. That person is a bonus, they are extra love and support, and they are an add-on to the enhancement of your life, not a missing piece to a puzzle.
Take matters into your own hands and embrace what comes your way, focus on loving what you do have, and more love will surely come and find you!