INSIGHT: The ‘loser’ magnet

First of all, I don’t really like using the word ‘loser’ but we must call a spade ‘a spade’ and not a big spoon. Do you seem to attract men with life membership at the ‘loser club’ all the time? Do you find yourself in a constant series of disappointing and unfulfilling relationships? Does it seem like all the wrong men swarm around you like bees to honey?

First of all, I don’t really like using the word ‘loser’ but we must call a spade ‘a spade’ and not a big spoon. Do you seem to attract men with life membership at the ‘loser club’ all the time? Do you find yourself in a constant series of disappointing and unfulfilling relationships? Does it seem like all the wrong men swarm around you like bees to honey?

Bad as it sounds, you are in fact a loser magnet. It seems pretty unfair that some women go into the dating game once, score the best there is and go on to live very happy and fulfilled lives. The not so lucky ones however keep a trail of good-for-nothing chaps closely behind them.

The most annoying thing is that some men really know how to hide their true selves. When pursuing a girl they will stop at nothing to impress her. Men can be so convincing that even when she hasn’t officially accepted his advances yet, she’ll be mentally picking out wedding china. Two weeks into the relationship she then discovers that the guy is one big nothing! 

You think women asking guys for money is bad? How about a guy who constantly asks his woman for money, even cab fare? It is not only wrong, but also seriously uncool. Yes we are cool with equality and we would love to pamper our men from time to time. But it has to be on our terms. I have no kind words for men who do a lot of nothing but get cozy at their girlfriends expenses.

I can’t say that everything went well for me, I’d be lying. In fact, for the life of me, when I look back at some of these fellows, I can’t understand what exactly attracted me to them in the first place. I just want to bludgeon myself to death lest anyone ever associates me with the chap again!

If you review your previous encounters with men, you might notice that you always enter relationships from a certain degree of fear, insecurity, low self esteem, desperation and if it’s really bad, a combination of everything aforementioned.

When you vibrate from a place of desperation and fear, you become a magnet for less desirable and usually shady men. It’s like the abused attracts the abuser and players attract the most vulnerable and insecure of women; the ones with stalking potential!

Maybe in order to bring a serious man into your life, you must begin to raise your vibration frequency. And to do this, you have to assess where you are vibrating from right now. Identifying the types of men and relationships you’ve been drawing to you and engaging in up until this point will give insight on what you need to work through in order to begin increasing your vibrations.

For example, if the men you’ve been attracting are nothing but opportunists, you need to work on your self worth and believe that you deserve better than a guy who only wants something from you. Addressing your self worth, insecurity and fear will not only keep unwanted pursuers at bay, it will also change your magnetism for a man more deserving of you.

 

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