Beingg a parent is a major responsibility. You are in charge of raising an individual to the point of becoming an adult with the goal of turning him or her into a valuable member of society. Therefore, this task requires care, love, understanding and the ability to keep the child on the right path at all times.
Parenting is one of the most rewarding aspects of life—only if done the right way. Solo parenting is a bigger task especially since everything is on your shoulder, but if you have time for your children you will never go wrong.
You have to make sure that your children are well brought up even when faced with extreme challenges. There is no such thing as being a perfect parent or even, perfect child. However, here are some guidelines on how to be the parent your child needs you to be.
The greatest thing you can give to a child is love. There is that natural instinct you get as a mother when the child is born. Some women put their frustrations of being a single mum onto their kids. That is not right. Love that child regardless of what hardships you are going through. Tell them you love them every chance you get to do so. This assures them of that love.
Care is as important as love. It should not be done for the sake of obligation. As a parent you are supposed to take care of your child, feed them, clothe them and provide them with everything they need to function in life. It is unlawful to have kids and not take good care of them—it doesn’t matter that you are a single parent or not. You just have to look after your kids.
Spend time with your child. I know you might be busy trying to make ends meet but you have to create time for the child. Listen to what they have to say and be more understanding. Ask for their opinion on certain things and talk to them about their day to day activities. They will feel close to you and the need to be even closer will arise – hence being less and less subordinate.
Hitting children is not the best way to discipline them. Talk to them when they fall short of your expectations. Remember that we all make mistakes but we learn from them. Show them how to learn from their mistakes without criticizing or scolding them.
Learn to give your child credit where credit is due. Whenever they do something good, encourage them to continue in that path. Try to provide a healthy daily routine that doesn’t involve work and no play. Make a regular schedule for their meals, nap time, play time and bed time.
Try to be consistent when making rules as a parent. Be mindful of the friends your child hangs out with, find out if they are they the best ones, or if they help in anyway. Help them choose good friends. Take note of the games your children play especially with this new technology sweeping in. Guide them on what video games to play, movies to watch, and music to listen to. All this will help you groom your child into a better person.
Being as honest with yourself and your child as you can; do not embarrass them (unless they embarrass you first)! Create effective communication skills by limiting your mood, desire, stress and pressure swings. Listen to the child and let them have the chance to see you listen to them too. This will make you look more human in your child’s eyes. Always admit your faults and even apologize, this gives children courage to open up too.
Help them with their studies like homework; do not leave everything to the teachers. Look at their behavior around other children. Are they selfish? Do they use abusive words? Whatever it is, find time alone with them and tell them about their wrong actions. Help them understand it. In doing this, you are helping them grow into responsible people.