This is the best segment of the month for salary and wage earners. And that’s for obvious reasons because salary time comes immediately after the all dreaded “week of death”. What is the week of death? The tail end of the month, when “shizzle” is tight and co-workers are in a volatile and highly irritable mood. The week of death is that time of the month when I have run out of deodorant and sprays and therefore resort to lemon and orange tree leaves to smell fresh. On the contrary, salary time is that time of the month when money lenders now rush to different banks to collect money owed to them by different debtors. Armed with a handful of cheques and cash withdrawal slips from their debtors, these money lenders will lie strategically in wait around the bank, waiting for the first rumor that his debtor has been paid, so that they can take off what is due to them. Salary time is the time of the month when irresponsible, party-loving young corporates now dash to their nearest bank branch or ATM machine to do the most despicable thing an educated and salaried worker could ever do, that is, empty their account in one go, on pay day. This shameful and irresponsible habit of account-emptying on pay day is very popular among low-wedge corporate earners, a category to which many of my not-so-well-behaved corporate friends fall. I used to be one of the people notorious for this habit of draining their salary account on pay day, until very recently when I got a pay raise and became rich. Of course that’s a lie, for people that really know me well. I am not rich, and neither have I stopped the habit of sweeping my account clean on pay day. In fact, I will continue draining my account the very instant I’m paid because it’s my money and I do what I want with it. also, there is safety in numbers – in knowing that this habit is shared among hundreds of thousands of broke or irresponsible corporate workers.
